Doug E. Pudge

Rachel Wednesday #5 - The Curve Ball

You know, I was thinking. When last we left the continuing saga of Doug and Rachel, the lovely Christian school teacher from Waterford had just paid a visit down to NewSong Community Church to check out the legitimacy of Doug's story! She left that day quite tired from the two of us being out so late the evening before but everything was fine. I went home that day just absolutely joyous. I really liked this woman and I was hoping that this could possibly be the kind of person that I was looking for in my life. I did my best to sleep that evening but it was tough. I was just .................................very happy! Things really seemed to be on the right track here and I might even get to stop all this eharmony stuff and really get into an actual relationship.

Monday March 20, 2006. This day began like most with my rising and getting prepared for my work day. When I got to work I wrote Rachel what was then and still probably is the longest email that I have ever sent her. I gave her details of everyone's impression of her and how good that impression was. I also didn't hold anything back about telling her how excited I was that we were going down this road together. By the way, this was also the day that my mom got admitted into the hospital for the first time so the day definitely was quite a busy and emotional one.

Late that evening around 9:30 Rachel called me. I was happy to get her call..................at first. She began to share with me about this other match that she had made quite a connection with before she and I had even met. He "dumped" her back a couple of months earlier (by email I might add) but had sent her another email Sunday night wanting to get back in contact with her. Rachel was now confused to say the least. Please understand that both of us were in the position of meeting people and had made no kind of commitment yet. But, she and I were off to such a great start with all of the lights apparently green, and now this. I had two basic reactions to this news. The first one was "I am glad that she has decided to share this with me, because she didn't have to!" The second one was "I can't believe this; things were going so well up until now!" I was really experiencing a lot of pain for the first time in a long time (at least as far as relationships are concerned). I tried to react the way that I should have reacted, but it was obvious that I wasn't pleased with this series of events. The one positive thing that was at the center of all of this was the fact that she never said she wanted to stop seeing me. She was just confused as to what to do and needed to figure things out.

The next couple of days were spent sending a few emails to Rachel. Now, she was just beginning the four night a week rehearsals for the Easter musical! Tuesday and Wednesday were days of complete silence from her and I thought for sure things were over. On Thursday I sent her another email with the subject "I'm concerned." One thing about me is that I would rather hear the bad news than no news at all. Silence really bothers me and I wanted to know what was going on. Thursday night she called me (very apologetically) and explained how she hadn't even checked her emails since Monday so she had no idea I'd been writing to her. Just a side note here, because Rachel was being quite careful about what information she was handing out to men that she had met on the internet, I still didn't have her phone number. When she called that night she didn't block the caller ID this time and she let me know that it was on purpose. What we talked about mostly was her guilt (which was unnecessary), and my feelings that there was still something here and I wasn't willing to give up on it. My exact words were "I'm not going anywhere unless you or God tell me to!" I was not going to give up yet. The next two weeks were going to be a challenge for us. She was just plain busy with so many things (not to mention the confusion issue) and I was just plain stubborn. The next few weeks would be time of great growth and a trip through one of my deepest valleys ever! Be blessed beyond belief today.

posted by Doug E. Pudge @ 7:45 AM